03/16/2022 - MY SEXUALITY
Okay, so I'm not sure of my sexuality yet, but, I THINK I might be Bi. But, my mom thinks that m|m or w|w are, for the lack of a better word, disgusting. This got me thinking, IF I WAS Bi, would she accept me (Mainly because I'm not convinced on my sexuality as I might not be into girls, and am probably straight)? And, my dad too. He thinks Homosexuality is a nonsense and a waste of time.
First of all, I want to emphasize that it's okay to not be sure. Life is all about growth and change as experiences come and go, and you might not know exactly who you are at times, but that is completely okay - in fact, it's a good thing! It shows that you're always listening to yourself and staying true to what you believe. So even though it may feel kind of weird now that you don't "know" yourself, trust me - you do know yourself, and even so, it's absolutely normal to be a little unsure.
I can't speak for your parents, but I know this from my own experience - if I say that I hate something (like chocolate milk - true story), it just means I'm a little scared of it, and unfamiliar with it. Once I tried chocolate milk though, I fell in love with it! Same with your parents - they could just be scared. They might not truly know what homosexuality and the LGBTQ+ spectrum entails. No matter what happens, remember that even though they love you doesn't mean they have the right to invalidate who you are. Your parents love you, and I trust that no matter what, they will learn to accept you for your identity.
Ultimately, don't feel pressured to "decide" your sexuality immediately. Exploring yourself takes time, and there is absolutely no rush! In that same vein, no matter what you discover about yourself, it's okay to not share it with your parents right away. Give yourself time to meet the new side of you that you just uncovered, and share it with your parents only when you feel ready. Again, there is no rush at all - don't ever feel like you "have" to do anything. Finally, I want to thank you. Sexuality can be very personal and sensitive, so I'm honored that you felt like you could trust us with this. I wish you the best of luck!
Hello, my names David, thank for reaching out to TeenTalk! It's really important that you're comfortable in your own body and you understand yourself. you still have your whole life to figure out what you want and who you want to be with. It's tough that you have parent's that might not support you. You can try talking with them so they become familiar about how you feel and there are tools online to help people understand LGBTQ+ if they might not yet fully grasp it. Here are two resources:
Hello! I'm so glad you decided to reach out, sexuality is a tough thing to navigate fs. While I am 100% not able to tell you if your mom and dad would accept you with open arms, I can say sexuality is a big part of a person's life, so figuring out how to talk to them about it is a great idea.
If you're not sure about yourself but wanted to see how they might react, you could talk about a friend being gay or bi. It's really hard for a lot of people to understand things they didn't grow up talking about or being accepting of, so it can take some getting used to. Trying to keep a calm conversation and sharing points of view are how I've best navigated talking to someone about something they say is nonsense. You know your parents best so I'm confident however you decide to approach it will work out :))
I'm sorry you have to be put in this situation; I really hope however it pans out they accept you in the end because you deserve no less.
I'm so glad that you decided to write to us! I think you're pretty brave for trying to find out more about your identity, and doing so is definitely not nonsense or a waste of time. Unfortunately, based on the information you've provided about your mom, it doesn't seem like she would be that supportive if you were to let her know that you are, or you might be bisexual. However, people can change, and sometimes their opinions may change when they're confronted with a situation they never expected to face, which may offer them a new perspective on things. I can't say for sure how your mom would react though, since I don't know her personally. Do you have any ideas why your mom isn't so supportive of gay or lesbian people (like are there any religious factors or maybe things in her upbringing)? Speaking more with your mom about why she thinks what she thinks about the LGBTQ+ community may help you better understand where she's coming from. It may also help you figure out how to approach the subject with your mom if you wish. Whatever you decide to do, remember that it's okay if you're not completely sure of your sexuality. One's sexuality is a fluid thing, but that doesn't make your orientation now (or the label that you think best fits you) any less valid. :)
09/14/2021 - Who am I?
Hi I am 12 years old in 7th grade.
I was wondering who am I?
My friends are choosing their pro-nouns
and sexuality but I don’t know who to be!
What do I do!?
I’m so glad you decided to message us :) I think the bravest thing someone can say is “I don’t know yet”. I feel like your feelings start developing but change a lot and that’s pretty normal. I think that’s why a lot of people default to “girl” or “boy” is because it takes a lot of soul searching to know how you feel for sure. Even if you don’t know yet, it’s perfectly fine to try things on. Like see how different pronouns end sexualities feel. Do you like it? Do some fit or do others not feel like you? It’s perfectly valid to feel one way one moment but different the next. I’d love to hear if you’ve thought about any identities or if you’d like to know more/have questions about any of the identities.
this graphic is pretty helpful and maybe you fill it out based on the day, it can change. And if it all feels overwhelming, you can always just educate yourself about the different identities and decide later. You can be a human, and that is always enough. How do you feel about your friends choosing identities?
I just want you to know how proud I am of you for reaching out to us. We are also available if you want to call/text/messenger us. My shift is on Thursdays from 6-9pm, you can just ask for me! :)
Good luck on learning more about you and I hope you message us back!
Thank u so much for reaching out to us we love love love hearing from u ! but yea totally i get that sometimes it’s hard to know who you are yet and mostly in a world where being yourself is starting to be totally accepted. It’s okay to not know who you are yet or your pronouns or any of that. this is something that takes time and even tho it’s hard and so confusing to not know who you are yet i promise it gets better. you can try to experiment with different pronouns for now and see which one sticks with you or maybe with friends. you can do it i believe in you seriously u realizing that you want to be someone different is such a huge step and recognizing it is even more important. you can do it!!!! im cheering you on!!!!
i work on tuesdays from 6-9 if u wanna talk more :) i’m cheering you on!!!!!
Hi! I hope your having a great day and thanks for sending your message! Well, to answer your question your you! Just because your friends are choosing pronouns or sexualities' doesn't mean you have to too. It takes time to find out who you are and who you want to be and explore yourself. You shouldn't feel pressured to be someone you're not :)