3/26/2026- Not like before
I don’t really know how to explain it, but something feels off between me and them lately, and it’s been bothering me more than I expected. We used to talk all the time, like it was easy and normal, and now everything feels kind of distant and awkward. I keep wondering if I did something wrong or said something that changed things, but I can’t figure out what it would be. It’s frustrating because I don’t even know if it’s real or if I’m just overthinking it, but either way it still hurts. I miss how things used to be, and I hate not knowing where I stand with them. I don’t want to bring it up and make it a big deal if it’s nothing, but at the same time pretending everything’s fine feels kind of fake.
from chloe
Hey there thanks for reaching out, I get what you mean, that kind of shift can feel really confusing. When something that used to feel easy suddenly feels off, it’s hard not to question yourself, even if you don’t actually know that anything went wrong. It makes sense that you’d miss how things used to be and feel stuck not knowing where you stand. Honestly, you’re not wrong for feeling this way, and you’re probably not just making it up either,sometimes dynamics really do change, even if no one says it out loud. If it keeps bothering you, it might be worth bringing up, just to clear the air a little. Something simple, like saying you feel like things have been a bit different lately, without accusing them of anything. However, try not to automatically assume you did something wrong. Relationships shift for all kinds of reasons, and it isn’t always about one specific thing. But you also don’t have to pretend everything’s fine if it doesn’t feel that way—that just makes it harder on you. Xoxo, Chloe <3 from Blair
Hi! Thank you so much for sharing this with us :) I've been in your situation a few times, in relationships and in friendships and I get how hard it is. I struggled for a long time with my social skills and didn't really know how to communicate in times like that. It really sucks, especially when the person means a lot to you and you just want things back to the way they were. In my situations, it usually wasn't something I did, but you won't know until you ask. I recommend finding a good time to talk to them when it's just you guys (in person preferably) and just casually being like "Hey, I just was wondering if we're okay? (and at some point in this I lightly will kind of joke about it being random or awkward to bring up, because honestly you just have to address the awkwardness and it'll lighten the tone, make the other person feel a bit more comfortable) "I've just been feeling like things have been different between us and I wanted to make sure I didn't do anything to upset you." I would also make sure to mention at some point in your conversation that you're just asking because you value your friendship or relationship and you care about them a lot. I hope everything goes well with you and that anything I said was helpful. Good luck and feel free to text/call in whenever. My shift is on Tuesdays if you need more advice on this. from hazel
Hey, my name's Hazel; thank you for reaching out! It sounds like you're in a tough situation. It always sucks feeling that something is wrong or kinda off, but not knowing exactly what it is, and wondering if it's something you did, or something about their feelings that changed, etc. You're certainly not the only one who's experienced this; I was also in a very similar situation last year with someone close to me. The strongest piece of advice I can give you is to communicate with them clearly about this. I know it's a lot easier said than done, but talking to them and getting their perspective and feelings on what's been happening is the fastest and easiest way to get a grasp on the situation. The biggest advantage to talking to them is that you would get information. Right now, all you know is that the vibe is off and that things feel weird. That's a completely valid thing to notice and feel; you should absolutely trust your gut if you think something's up. But currently, you don't really know for sure what the cause is or how the other person is really feeling. That lack of information can create a lot of uncertainty and fear. The situation might not be as bad as you think, but because you can't quite tell what the other person's thinking, it's easy to worry and stress about it a lot, which feels pretty awful. If you're able to talk with them about what you've noticed and how you've been feeling, you might find that it's not you, and that there's some entirely different reason they've been acting strange. You might find that there's been some kind of misunderstanding. Maybe they feel just as confused as you do. Or, worst case scenario, you find out that they are acting differently because of you. If that's the case, at least you'll know what happened, and can evaluate the situation properly. I know it's really hard to have a relationship start to feel like it's falling apart. It sounds like you're close to this person and care about preserving your relationship with them. I can tell that you're very thoughtful and are truly considerate of them. I know it feels very uncomfortable to bring something like this up with someone; it might feel like you're just creating problems from nothing or making things worse, but open and honest communication is really the key to understanding and resolving situations like this. I wish you all the best in dealing with this; I hope that things can be resolved between the two of you. But regardless of the end result I hope you know that you're a wonderful person, and I'm rooting for you! Best, Hazel :3 from wesley
Hey, this is Wesley! I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through this. I know how hard it can be to grow apart from someone that you used to be really close to, and I definitely know how it feels to wonder if it was because of something that you said or did. I know you said that you don’t really want to bring it up with them, but I think that could really help you to make sure both of you are on the same page. It doesn’t need to be a big deal - maybe you could just say something to them like “Hey, I feel like we’ve been a little more distant recently, are you doing okay?” Sure, it might be a little awkward in the moment, but I think it would help a lot to get rid of some of the worry that you’re feeling right now. It’s really important to be able to have healthy conversations in a relationship, even if it’s uncomfortable sometimes. If it’s really not something that you want to bring up with them, maybe there’s an adult or a friend in your life that you’d be more comfortable going to? You could brainstorm some ideas on how you might approach it once you’re feeling up to it. I’m so glad you decided to reach out to us, and I really hope you reach out again sometime. My shift is on Wednesdays from 5 - 8 if you ever want to talk! Wesley from may
Hi! My name is May. I'm so glad you reached out to us. First of all, I totally understand where you're coming from. I've been in situations similar to this before and I think this is a very common experience. Ultimately, I think you should definitely talk to your partner about this. I know if my partner were feeling this way about me I would want them to talk to me about it. I also think in any healthy relationship, you should be able to bring things up that bother you, and your partner should listen and try their best to clear things up. Also, even if you are overthinking things, your feelings are valid. If you feel like something is off, you should work with your partner on improving how you feel about your relationship. Thank you again for reaching out. I hope you can contact us again if you need to talk more! -May from dylan
Hi, this is Dylan with Teen Talk. You're very brave to share what you're going through right now. This sounds like a tough situation to be in, and I can only imagine how confusing this must be for you. Sometimes relationships can go through phases where you feel a little more distant from your significant other, especially if school, family, or extracurriculars get in the way. It's totally normal to feel hurt and confused when you feel like they're being distant. In this situation, it may be helpful to talk to your significant other about how you're feeling. This could help you to understand why they're being distant or if you really are just overthinking it (which is also totally normal!!). Talking could also help you figure out where you guys stand. If you really don't want to talk to this with your significant other, it might be helpful to talk to a trusted adult or friend about this. I hope this helps, please feel free to reach back out. I'm available to talk on Wednesdays from 4-7 PM. Best of luck! -Dylan from layla
Hello, my name is Layla. I wanted to thank you for reaching out!! I personally am in the exact same position right now; you are definitely not alone. When you have a relationship and things start feeling weird or just off, it definitely makes you think what did I do wrong or said something and that is totally normal because when you love someone and things feel off or failing apart, it is hard. I understand where you're coming from and being frustrated is okay. Missing how things used to be is totally normal. when you love or care about someone, it may be hard to know how to express how you are feeling because there could be a scare of " What if they are mad at me" or " Will they change how they feel about me" I wonder if you guys could sit down and have an honest conversation, you could express how you feel and then let them share how they feel. I know conversations like this can be difficult and honestly scary. I totally understand that feeling, I actually was just in this situation last week, I personally had to push myself to have a hard conversation. It was difficult. Thank you again for reaching out again. I hope everything goes well. I'm wishing the best for you. Teen Talk is open Monday-Thursday 4-9pm and Friday 4-7pm. If you would like to talk to me personally, I volunteer, Wednesdays 5-8pm -Layla 3/09/2026-Confused
Hello, I am not sure how to word or explain this. But I really wanted to figure something out. I have a boyfriend and never expected to do anything before the age of 18. However, the last time I saw him, my emotions took over and I was about to do something that felt right at the time, but I knew I couldn't. I'm just not sure anymore; I know I shouldn't, but when I'm with him, my mind isn't in the right place. Yes, he asked, "Are you certain?" I said yes... I consented; now I feel like an idiot. I am not sure anymore. I don't regret saying what I said because it seemed like a good idea at the time, and even if nothing happened, it could happen again. And I might say yes again... I am afraid. And we haven't discussed what happened. And I apologize for asking, and I understand that I can't pick and choose what you say, but I don't want to discuss this issue with him... because I don't want to talk about how I lost control of my emotions... I know I should, but I don't think it's that simple. I'm sorry; I know I rambled and it's all tangled, but that's how my thoughts are right now.
from marley
Hey! Thank you for reaching out, it can be nerve wracking every once in a while, so know you're appreciated for your courage. It's more than okay to experience something like you went through and feel anxious or uncertain about the situation. Intimacy, no matter the degree can feel scary and overwhelming, and you're more than in your right place to say that something feels off or that you're worried you could be pushed past something you're comfortable with in the moment. Confrontation is something that can be difficult too, and I more than understand where you might be coming from. It's not my place to tell you what you should do or say to your partner but if I can give you any advice it's to stick to your boundaries. It's clear your gut is telling you what you feel most comfortable with, even if it's hard to face, never stop listening to the voice inside of you that tells you something feels off. No matter how close you and your partner are, it's still okay to feel uneasy, and you shouldn't feel pressured to please or appease them (in any way) simply because you care for them. On another note, I hope this is somewhat helpful and that this finds you in better spirits! Marley from layla
Hello, I wanted to thank you for reaching out. I understand where you're coming from, having your emotions take over must be hard. I have not been in this situation before though so I wouldn't really know. Maybe you could like hangout in like a park or something maybe that would help? Like I said I'm honestly just brainstorming ideas. I do know what it's like to say something you may feel uncertain if you should of replied that way or said something. It's kind of hard because sometimes you don't really think about it fully before you speak, and it's totally normal. You definitely aren't alone in this. Don't be sorry, I'm so glad you reached out!! You aren't alone and deserve support. I really hope you find a way to handle things in a way that is safe and comfortable for you. I'm wishing you the best. stay strong. If you ever want to talk more, my name is Layla I volunteer Wednesdays 5-8 if you would like to chat. -Layla 🙂 from blair
Hi, I'm Blair! I first want to say that it is really brave of you to talk about this. So many teenagers feel really scared about bringing up sex/sexual behavior (I assumed this is what you are referring to, I apologize if I am wrong) in any kind of dialogue. I don't know your background with sex and what all your beliefs are around it, since that definitely plays a part in what exactly I'd say about the situation, but from what I know, I would first make sure to avoid shaming yourself. Sex is a normal part of life, and many people have feelings like yours. It also sounds like this is new ground for you and you're clearly confused about what to do, which is also normal and nothing to be ashamed of. My advice moving forward: Consent can be given and revoked at any time! It's not mean to your partner to revoke consent, and you can change your mind at any point. You're not an idiot. If you feel conflicted about it and you don't want situations like that to happen in the future, avoid situations where that could happen. Be out in public rather than alone with him. My final thing is talk about it. I know you said you don't want to, which is valid, I'd be nervous as well. But if you cannot talk about sex or sexual behavior, you probably shouldn't participate in sex or sexual behaviors. Being able to have a mature conversation is 100% necessary. Anyway, I appreciate you reaching out and I hope all goes well. I volunteer on Tuesdays 5-8 if you ever wanna talk! from dylan
Hi, thank you for reaching out! You're very brave to share what you're going through right now. This sounds like a very confusing situation to be in and I'm very sorry. It's completely normal to change your mind in situations like this, and you shouldn't feel like an idiot for expressing how you feel. I totally get why you wouldn't want to talk to about this with your boyfriend, it can definitely be a vulnerable conversation to have, but it may be beneficial for you to have a conversation about how you're feeling. This may help him understand how you're feeling and help you to both continue to prioritize safety and feeling comfortable in your relationship. I totally understand though if you really don't want to talk to him about this. I would also recommend talking about this situation with a trusted adult, so that they can help you to work through how you are feeling and potentially create a plan for how to prevent anything from happening if that's what you're wanting. A website I found that may help is the loveisrespect webpage, there are a couple of articles about& intimacy, safe sex, and respect that may help in this situation. Again, thank you for reaching out and please feel free to reach back out! I'm available to talk at Teen Talk on Wednesdays from 4-7pm. Dylan from wesley
Hey, thank you so much for reaching out! I've had some similar experiences, and I know how it feels to get caught up in the moment and say or do things that feel right at the time but end up second guessing it later. If you're not comfortable talking about it with him, are there any people in your life that you'd feel safe going to for advice about practicing safe sex or consent or something like that? Maybe a parent, school counselor, doctor, friend, or someone else that you trust? On the other hand though, if you're not comfortable talking to your partner about sex and stuff like that, I'm not sure if that's something you're ready for. It's important to be able to have those conversations and figure out boundaries and what you're comfortable with and what you're not. Another thing that I think might be helpful for you is to make more plans with him to spend more time together in public or with friends. I get that you're worried about it happening again, but if you spend most of your time together alone, chances are good it's gonna happen again, and I think it would be good to have some other people to help take some of that pressure off. It's nothing to be ashamed of and it's totally normal to have these feelings, but it's good to set limits and respect each other's boundaries. I hope this helped you at least a little bit, and I'm so glad that you were comfortable enough to share this. Please don't hesitate to reach out again! - Wesley from sage
Hey this is sage from teentalk, I want to say thank you for reaching out, I know it can be scary to talk and ask for advice on things like this so I am proud of you. When it comes to relationships, especially being a minor in a relationship I think it is important that you are talking with your partner as much as you can, but i also get that it can be scary for situations like the one you described. I want you to know that making a mistake in a relationship is okay, you're still young and have time to learn and grow from your mistakes as well, and if your boyfriend was consensual the whole way he is a good person and wants you to feel comfortable being with him. But i also want you to know that it is your body and your choice, if you think you messed up and regret what you did, it is your choice 100% if you want to do it again or wait until you feel ready. Your boyfriend should be understanding in your choice as your feelings for eachother are mutual, and when it comes to emotional factors of intimacy that is important as well. I want you to know that you're supported and were on your side here at teentalk and I wish you luck when it comes to you and your boyfriend for whatever obstacles you are going to face together. We're always here during the week from 4-7 if you ever feel like you want to talk to one of us live for more support and understanding. With love, Sage from chloe
Hey there thank you for reaching out, What is happening is tough. what it seems like is regrated consent, which is where consent is given but later feels remorse or guilt or even shame and while consent was given the emotional aspect can lead to regret afterwards. being afraid is totally okay. I know as a young adult its hard to talk about things like this with your partner but sometimes a conversation goes a long way even if its a little awkward at first. however that being said, you mentioned if it happened again you would say yes and that's totally okay to do. but before it happens think a for a minute and decide if you want to do it. while you consented that doesn't mean you have to consent again. communication in a relationship is really good to have not a lot of people have that so again while it may be awkward to have the conversation with him it might be good. you don't have to say that you lost control over your emotions but talk about the guilt because he's there to help you get through it. And having control over emotions can be difficult 100% and there's nothing wrong with that it takes practice. but please feel free to reach out xoxo, Chloe 12/23/25-My best friend
what do I do when my guy bestfriend has a gf but flirts with me and I've liked him for a while but I don't wanna ruin his relationship or our friendship?
from chloe
Hi there, I'm Chloe, I will say I have experienced this a few times- one time they were in a full-blown relationship with one of my friends, I get not wanting to ruin his relationship as well as your guy's friendship. But I also don't know him but maybe he is just a flirtatious person you know? As someone with a guy best friend I obviously liked him but that was back in like elementary school but that's just a phase I feel like every girl goes through when having a guy best friend. This is a sticky situation to be in because it's hard to know what to do because two things are at stake which you don't want to ruin. The advice I would give you is just kind of ignore the flirting if you can and just respond in a normal way. I wish I could give you more advice, but I don't really know the situation while I've delt with this kind of thing in the past every situation is different. from kit
Hi, thank you for reaching out! My best advice would be to not do anything. I know that might not be the answer you are wanting to hear but if he already has a girlfriend then I don't recommend making any moves. Sometimes I flirt with my friends and they flirt with me but it's purely just as an inside joke and both people are always comfortable with it. I'm not sure if maybe he is just flirting because he is comfortable with you or if there are feelings behind it. If it is bothering you, you can always say something to him about it. I'm sorry though that things have been complicated with your friend. I wish you the best! -Kit from Lina
Lina here! I just wanted to let you know, first and foremost, that this isn’t your fault. Being a teenager is difficult, and the fact is, love is complicated. Second of all, I hate to admit this, but people say I have a flirtatious personality, and it sucks because I do feel like I lead people on sometimes—or maybe I just have too much rizz and aura, but I don’t know. However, the point is, i understand how you might feel led on by him due to his flirts. Third, **HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND!** This is a very important piece of information. I mean, even if he *did* like you, acting on it would be cheating. Having feelings is completely natural, but acting on those feelings *is* cheating. Look, I’m sorry, but if he’s catching feelings outside of his relationship, that’s a red flag—meaning he could do the same thing in *your* relationship too. Best-case scenario: he doesn’t like you, and maybe you wait until he’s out of the relationship. Sorry if this sounds harsh, but these are just my morals and thoughts. Once again, I only want you happy and safe, and a cheater won’t keep you happy in the long term. Just some thoughts—I don’t know the whole situation. Enjoy your day/night, and if you’d like to talk more, I text or call on Monday from 6–9 p.m. **GOOD LUCK!** --Lina signing off from payton
Hi there! Thank you so much for reaching out! That sounds like a hard situation to be in, im sure it leads to a lot of feeling being felt. I would recommend that you just talk to him, I think that the only way anything will change. You don’t have to come straight out and say “I like you” but you could try to ask him how he feels? I know that probably sounds scary but I think communication is the only way anything will happen. I hope everything gets figured out and you are able to stay friends with him in the long run :). Feel free to reach out again anytime! 11/14/2025-Help
*sigh*
theres this guy....he is soooo adorable but he has a gf and i feel like he likes me but idk at river its comfusing with this kind of stuff i dont know what to do.. help? FROM LINA
Wowww! that sounds like a lot of emotions. Hiii! Im Lina, i'm a volunteer here at teen talk! I think your really brave for sharing these thoughts, many might keep them to themselves. Respect. I've been in a similar situation, but more like reversed roles. long story. but, if this cute guy has a girlfriend and does like you, thats up to you and him where to go from there. but even before we jump to conclusions, you have to ask. He does have a girlfriend, so maybe you could talk to her if you know her about her bf possibly catching feelings for you. However, i have no clue what your relationship with his girlfriend is, and coming outta the blue to say "hey, i think your bf might like me, btw, i like him" might sound crazy to her... so, my advice. Think it over. Maybe you guys are just friends. Maybe you truly do like him, and he truely likes you. But, taking time to really think before we act, especially in this situation, wont hurt. and the last thing we need is someone getting heart broken. Second, i think its up to you. If you truly want to confess to him, do it. however, i do believe talking to his girlfriend before you go and confess might be smart. but, only if you feel comfortable. I would like to add, that if he has a girlfriend, and he likes you-- you could, correct me if im wrong, deem it as cheating. And personally for me, if my lover who i was with fell for another girl while i was with him, i'd feel heartbroken, and i respectfully would call him a cheater. and this is all just my opinion, but, if he cheated on me in my relationship, whats gonna stop him from cheating on the next. i want you happy, but i want you to make smart decision, relationship wise, you may want him now, but be aware... we're all young, we're not the brightest, but i want you to really think before anything goes down. if he ends up liking you... that is all up to you guys. Whether he wants to date you, whether you want to date him. its all up to you. I shared what i'd do, i do hope this ends up okay! wishing you luck! I want you safe <3 and Happy! Remember that! Lina from flora
Hello, this is Flora, and thank you for reaching out with your thoughts. This can be a difficult situation to navigate through; however, I want to remind you that it's okay to have unexpected romantic feelings for a person. I don't know the full situation since I'm not sure if you are friends with him or not, but if you are, I would keep your feelings to yourself since he does have a relationship. It's normal to find him cute, especially if you have a crush on him, but I would say to respect his relationship. Another thing is that people may naturally be flirty and friendly without realizing it. Honestly, if he is giving you mixed signals while he has a girlfriend, you should take a step back and rethink this friendship. One tip, for this situation, is you could randomly say to him, like "Sometimes I can’t tell if we’re just really friendly or if the vibe is something else. I don’t want to misread anything.” This can allow him to answer and decide if he wants to be honest with you, as well as clarify any miscommunication. Another point is just watch his actions towards you, and keep being friendly. The biggest tip I would give you is to focus on yourself and do things that you enjoy to keep you from overthinking. I hope this message helps you to decide on what to do next! If you ever want to talk to a buddy, I'm always here for you! My shift is on Thursday from 5-8 pm! Flora from payton
Hey there! Thank you for reaching out! I totally get that it might be confusing to figure out what to do in a situation like that. My biggest suggestion is to just talk to him. Maybe if you just express how you’re feeling, you could feel less confused about what to do! It’s totally okay to not know what to do though, sometimes things can be really confusing! Patience is also key, maybe if you give it some time, things could become clearer and you’ll know what to do? I hope everything goes well and you figure it out! Feel free to write again! -Payton from May
Hi! I'm May. Thank you for reaching out. This sounds like a really complicated situation. If I were in this situation, I would try to take a step back. In my opinion, it's okay to be friends with him, but not anything more. I completely understand having feelings for him, and that's okay because you can't control how you feel! However, he has a girlfriend, and I think it's also important to be respectful to her. Again, thank you for reaching out. I hope you have a good day, and please reach out again if you want to talk more! from hazel
Hey, thanks for reaching out! My name's Hazel :D Oof...that is definitely a funky spot to be in. Having a crush is already confusing, but the fact that he already has a girlfriend means things can easily get messy. And honestly, I feel like a lot of kids our age and at school tend to give off these mixed signals, so it makes sense you don't really know what to think. He might seem like he likes you, but when someone's already taken, I'd strongly suggest not starting anything. While I have no doubt that he's adorable (I understand the challenge of not wanting to pass up on someone who seems really cool!), I think you need to prioritize your own interests and protect your heart. You deserve someone who's actually available, and who won't leave you guessing and stuff. I hope my perspective was able to give you some more ideas as to what to do! If you want to discuss anything more in-depth, we're always here to talk it through with you. Best, Hazel from kit
Hello, Thank you for reaching out to teen talk about what's going on in your life. I think your feelings are totally valid. I've had where I was crushing on someone who was dating someone else. My best advice would be to step away. It's okay to have feelings for them but I don't recommend getting involved with anyone that is dating someone else. -Kit from blair
I wouldn't waste your time on him. If he does actually like you and isn't breaking up with his girlfriend that's not fair to her and it means he probably doesn't respect his romantic partners very much. He probably wouldn't treat you any different to her. Nobody is cute enough to be worth all the mess that will come up during situations like that. I promise. Blair from dylan
Hi, Thanks for reaching out. I can't say that I know all the details of this situation or have ever been in your shoes, but I'm sorry that you're having to go through this. Personally, I think it's totally fine to have feelings for someone who's in a committed relationship, as long as you don't try to break it up. He may have feelings for you, but I think it's important to take into account how his girlfriend would feel if she knew this was happening. It definitely sucks when guys can be confusing, but in this situation, I think the best option morally is to move on and find someone you like who isn't in this complicated of a situation. I can't imagine how confusing this must feel, but I wish you the best of luck in getting through this. Thanks again for reaching out, please feel free to write us again, call in, or text if you have further questions or want to talk about this situation. I'm personally available on Wednesdays from 4-7pm. -Dylan Comments are closed.
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